bette1985 hat geschrieben:
But I cudn't help feeling so sad as that quarrel mirrored the one I had with my ex of 13 years. I was like Carla, in such a fiery mood that I refused to listen & when my ex kept quiet (like Stella did) I got even more pissed. That was the start of a series of misunderstandings which led to the end of our relationship. Looking back now, I felt that if I had been more patient & understanding then, I wud not have lost the love of my life.
Sorry for my sob story, just needed to get that out coz I'm wetting my pillow. :heul:
Hey,
Bette! Sorry for my delay in responding. Things have been crazy for the past few days! Phew! Hopefully I can finally answer all my e-mails and get updated on the forum now!
First off, thanks for sharing your thoughts about your own experience that parallels what happened with Starla. I'm sorry to hear about your past relationship which I'm sure really brought a lot of painful memories when you watched the break-up episode. It was quite an intense quarrel between the 2 and both actors did a fine job. My gosh, CH was so piercingly cold toward Stella based on her misjudgement that I felt so sorry for Stella 'coz I wouldn't want to be in her shoes at that moment! But I also thought that while Carla was too quick to drop a verdict on Stella, I can understand how she must've felt 'coz she's very defensive and sensitive when it comes to Ansgar/Maria 'coz she's already been burnt by them one too many times already. So, whatever they do, she gets very touchy & extremely upset. Also, she's said it to Stella more than once that Stella's the only person in the world she trusts. So we kinda know that Carla's put all her "eggs" (in this case, trust) in one basket. So when that one basket (Stella) explodes, things naturally go haywire, so to speak. So, being so sensitive about Ansgar and his tactics already, she naturally jumped into conclusion that Stella was against her as well when she happened to overhear the last part of what Maria was saying and Stella's agreement to it. And once she's in that fiery mood, Carla will not listen to anyone nor any reason except hers. And it doesn't help when Stella is the opposite of Carla - quiet, reserved and keeps everything inside.
I think the writers wrote this story very well. Hence, people who've had similar experience as Starla, like you, actually could feel the intensity, the angst, the various emotions that are conjured up as a result of lack of understanding, lack of patience, lack of trust between two people in a relationship.
I hope the writers stay true to the continuance of this development between Carla and Stella. This is the stage of the relationship where we really see how they can reconcile. In relationships, when 2 people are sharing their life together, we always have to get through the obstacles/hurdles of misunderstanding, misjudgement between each other. That's why fights are healthy as long as we're able to reconcile with our differences and learn to understand, be patient and trust each other. In other words, communication is key! With reconciliation comes strength in the relationship. That's my opinion, anyway!
Thank GOD for the previews - at least, now that we know there's a happy ending (yay!) I don't feel depressed about their fight and dreading for the bad ending!
Hey, mate, the only thing I can say is that we all learn as we tread our journey of life. Based on my personal experience, I feel that learning from my own trials and tribulations in relationships or anything in life, the harder they are to bear, I find that just when I least expect it, something positive turns up right around the corner. It's truly amazing sometimes when I think about it. But I guess that's what makes life so unpredictable and challenging. We'd never know what we're going to get. I truly believe that. So, don't beat yourself up too badly, mate. That thing that you least expect, it's gonna turn up, if it hasn't already, I'm sure of it!!! (Hopefully I don't sound too crazy, eh?

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