The next "lost scene" starts after the talk between Carla and Sarah and before the scene in the kitchen (also episode 3328). Here is the clip:
clip (thanks to
CarlaFreak)
A sleepless night – Part 1
Carla's POV
"The question is – do you really wanna be without her?"
Damn, how should she answer that question? Carla desperately looked at Sarah, took a deep breath and looked at Sarah again.
"Don't be mad but I think I'll go now, it's been a hard day."
"No problem, I have to keep practicing for the audition anyway."
"Okay then, good night."
"You too."
When Carla left the room the sound of Beethoven's
Moonlight Sonata was haunting her. It suited her mood so she sat down on the windowsill and listened to the piano. She still had tears in her eyes, tears of disappointment, tears of hurt, tears of frustration. What a difference from what she’d been feeling just a few hours before when she’d thought all of her dreams would come true.
When Justus told her about Stella's invitation to the
Schneiders she almost jumped for joy. She'd thought 'Hey, maybe the kiss left an impression on her after all.', despite having told Stella that the kiss was absolutely meaningless. Full of anticipation she'd rifled through her clothes to find the right outfit, elegant and sexy but not too provocative. She hadn’t had so much fun in a very long time.
Deep in thought Carla almost missed that the music had stopped as she heard Sarah coming to the door. Quickly she stood and went to her quarters. She didn't want to meet Sarah again. The questions she asked her before were painful enough.
"Aren't you afraid that you'll miss her?"
Carla closed her eyes. Were her feelings for Stella really so obvious to everyone around her? Sarah could have left out the additional
"I mean missing her as manager of the Castle.", Carla knew she was busted. It was just a fact – Stella caused emotional chaos in her and she couldn't do anything to stop it. When had this started?
Was it when Gregor told her that Stella was a lesbian too? No, it was already too late by then.
Or was it when they’d organized everything together for Luise's arrival? Carla had to grin a little bit. At least by that point she'd realized how damn attractive her new employee was. Until today she couldn't remember what Gregor had wanted from her that day, something about 20.000 EUR – Stella was too distracting standing there just in her bra.
If she really thought about it, Stella Mann triggered powerful feelings in Carla since the first meeting. In the beginning it was resentment, anger and bewilderment – a whole lot of negative emotions she just couldn't ignore. Of course she never would admit that to her employee.
So when had these old feelings changed? It seemed good feelings had been growing all along. Still, it wasn’t as though Stella still didn’t drive her crazy from time to time.
She flashed back to the situation at the
NoLimits after the party and shivered when she thought about the attack of that slimy guy. And then – out of nowhere – Stella had been there and chased him away. Protectively, she'd put her coat around Carla's shoulders and then given her a strong drink. Carla had savored the sensation of complete safety until she realized that it was her employee beside her. She'd run away, ashamed to let Stella see how vulnerable and weak she was at that moment. But this night had changed her view of the young woman, she just didn't know where the change would take her. From that night on Carla tried to work together with Stella instead of waiting for the next mistake she might make. It wasn't always successful but their work-relationship was better now and she had to admit that Stella was quite good at her job. She always had a solution for the daily challenges. Sometimes her ideas were a little unusual but in the end effective.
At that moment she remembered of what she'd accused Stella tonight.
"You have absolutely NO IDEA of professional behavior nor do you have a sense for the social nuances necessary in our society circles." She was ashamed of herself. She'd let Stella go home with the feeling of being completely incompetent – and that just wasn't true. Carla saw Stella's face before her when they talked about terminating her on of the employment. She wasn't sure, but had there been tears in those blue-green eyes?
Carla had completely lost track of time, with all these thoughts. It was nearly 5 a.m. now and she couldn't even think about sleeping, she was too upset. In 3 hours she'd go jogging anyway. 'Jogging – oh great, Stella, our unforgettable first meeting.' Okay, it was useless, she wouldn't get this woman out of her mind so she just would stop trying. Standing beside the crib of her sleeping daughter she thought 'Thank god, it will take a while until you'll have love problems.'
Something had become clear to Carla tonight. She'd completely overreacted in the fight with Stella because of being hurt about the set-up. Yes, it hurt her that Stella wasn't interested in her, and she needed distance to get a grip on her feelings. But she knew she’d hurt Stella too, and a resignation wasn't justified. And if Carla was honest with herself she didn't want to end their work-relationship.
"The question is – do you really wanna be without her?"
'No.', Carla thought, 'I don't want to. I'm not ready to let Stella walk out of my life.'
The End – Part 1.